After what I think has been a very rocky first year of marriage, my husband finally got through to me and I've discovered what he figured out awhile ago... I'm quite bossy.
Now, he has his own demons and I know he's been working very hard on them, so I know it's in both of our best interests for me to fix my problems too.
Enter "The Surrendered Wife". I googled "how to be less bossy" and "how to be less controlling" and this book came up. I read it in two days and I love it. I'm just starting out trying the methods and was curious if anyone else had read it or would be open to reading it and discussing it here.
The biggest revelation for me has been that almost everything I'm saying that I think is "helpful" is really just communicating to him I don't trust his abilities. Additionally, if I really want to have a traditional marriage (and not be constantly stressed out) I need to give up doing the household finances - this hasn't been broached yet because I also know he doesn't really want to do them, so I'm waiting for a good moment to explain that I can't do it anymore and I need his help.
Anyway, thanks for listening to this and I would welcome any productive thoughts!
While I think Seventh_Jim was maybe a bit harsh, I also think he's right. There's no place in a marriage for nagging. Nagging has never made a man want to listen to his wife.
Any man can be a leader with his wife if she steps out of the way and allows him to.
On an unrelated note, are there any actual women in this "Traditional Wives" subverse? I was hoping for some female camaraderie...
sharkbait 1 points 3.6 years ago
While I think Seventh_Jim was maybe a bit harsh, I also think he's right. There's no place in a marriage for nagging. Nagging has never made a man want to listen to his wife.
Any man can be a leader with his wife if she steps out of the way and allows him to.
On an unrelated note, are there any actual women in this "Traditional Wives" subverse? I was hoping for some female camaraderie...