I went to a grad party at a relatives house and it dawns on me how incredibly unsociable I am. There was some serious money at that party and that had a little to do with it but, I really had no interest in speaking with any of the people there. It was like they are living their life on easy mode, bankers, Drs., lawyers, etc., while recreationally golfing and then I am living my life on hard mode. I still have a white collar job but I slaughter my own chickens, grow my own vegetables and chop my own firewood.
I've made alot of bad decisions and not lived the best life. When I am forced into social situations I am fighting panic attacks and the baffled confusion of what is even the purpose of this gathering. What do they get out of it and why don't I get the same thing?
How to connect and be part of the whole has eluded me my whole life and it is a lonely, bitter place.
IdlyDyiny 4 points 1.9 years ago
Resentment is a poison.
I've made alot of bad decisions and not lived the best life. When I am forced into social situations I am fighting panic attacks and the baffled confusion of what is even the purpose of this gathering. What do they get out of it and why don't I get the same thing?
How to connect and be part of the whole has eluded me my whole life and it is a lonely, bitter place.