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6

Today I bought four Bic Pens and I'm gunna hide them from my wife...

submitted by paul_neri to ShitpostLitterBox 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 01:46:17 ago (+9/-3)     (i.ibb.co)

https://i.ibb.co/rG6G5gQ/Bic-Pens.jpg

so that when I want a f..king pen I know where it will be.


37 comments block


[ - ] totes_magotes 5 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 06:41:32 ago (+5/-0)

If you stick them up your butt, you'll always know where they're at!

[ - ] ruck_feddit 3 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 06:49:31 ago (+3/-0)

Pens, scotch tape, and the pair of scissors that actually cut well.

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 06:58:37 ago (+1/-0)

the scissors, don't mention the scissors! I think I had 12 scissor-happy months before she found them. I didn't think she could reach that high.

[ - ] CHIRO 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 09:09:15 ago (+1/-0)

I love that this experience is so common that you were easily able to nail all three. I have been with exactly one woman that has ever put these items back where they belong, and she was manic. For some reason it is just not in a normal woman's nature to be able to replace pens, scotch tape, and scissors in the same place twice in sequence. They can get it back to the original spot if there is a layover place in between, but it is like a law of physics for them that they can't touch the same spot in the drawer twice without a week in between, in needed-things limbo.

[ - ] ruck_feddit 2 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 10:37:51 ago (+2/-0)

And to think, one of our faggot users accused me of not really being married this morning. I think this proves him wrong.

If I remember, when I get home I'll post a picture of my scissors I keep in my lab. I could cut the whole world in half with those things.

[ - ] ruck_feddit 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 21:21:52 ago (+1/-0)

My daddy-rabbit pair of scissors: https://files.catbox.moe/b6hs3k.jpg

[ - ] CHIRO 0 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 21:35:25 ago (+0/-0)

Now that's a big ass pair of scissors haha.

[ - ] deleted 2 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 05:39:05 ago (+2/-0)

deleted

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 05:51:13 ago (+0/-0)

I do not understand but I suspect it's not very nice.

[ - ] deleted 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 18:15:30 ago (+1/-0)

deleted

[ - ] GeneralDisarray 2 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 02:48:12 ago (+2/-0)

Living with women is just infuriating at times.

Do you think Elon can give them hope?

Maybe he can upgrade their brains so that logic would even be possible?!

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 03:50:30 ago (+1/-0)*

you nailed it - infuriating. The "purse" is the real killer for me. She can never find her f..king purse because she never puts it in the same spot. It is dumped on the nearest flat surface which could be anywhere and once it was...a public seat (lost $90).

[ - ] Anus_Expander 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 10:34:59 ago (+1/-0)

I bought my then GF a very expensive leather jacket for her birfday, and she left it on a bus the next day. Live and learn. 'Here's a gift card'.

[ - ] Youdgetfuckedfaggot 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 07:56:35 ago (+1/-0)

This is why I'm in charge of where everything is.

[ - ] diggernicks 0 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 08:52:30 ago (+0/-0)

Your bf is ok with that?

[ - ] fritz_maurentod 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 05:59:08 ago (+1/-0)

It's funny to see how we men have the same problems no matter where we live.

[ - ] PotatoWhisperer 2 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 09:40:59 ago (+2/-0)

Almost as if behavior is heavily determined by genotype. (WTF, spellcheck doesn't have genotype in it?)

[ - ] Anus_Expander 2 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 10:33:41 ago (+2/-0)

my spellcheck didn't have 'nigger', I had to teach it

[ - ] PotatoWhisperer 0 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 11:26:13 ago (+0/-0)

Yeah, it's just something I've been noticing in the last couple of years. For whatever reason spellcheckers are dumbed-down and missing a variety of words. (like DUMBED-down for example) Most of the words missing tend to be things not in common conversational English, like genotype for example.

Which makes no logical sense considering the sheer "horsepower" of modern computational devices. I think it's either lazy/shitskin programmers who have no idea what they are doing, or it is intentional in order to dumb-down the modern lexicon of those who need spellcheck for everything they do.

Dumbing down the language currently spoken has its use in controlling thought, see 1984 for examples.

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 05:59:48 ago (+0/-0)*

what's funny about it![but I know what you mean].

[ - ] account deleted by user 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 02:02:37 ago (+1/-0)

account deleted by user

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 4 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 02:12:17 ago (+4/-0)

This is a serious issue in many homes where a female is present. In the past 6 months I must have put about 8 pens on my desk from a packet in a drawer and ... they kept disappearing. I put a red one there and when it disappeared went looking for it and a red pen that looked very similar was on her desk but as to the other seven? At one stage I tied a pen to the kitchen table (for shopping lists) and ... it too disappeared. Like in a household of two people...

[ - ] account deleted by user 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 02:23:47 ago (+1/-0)

account deleted by user

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 02:25:55 ago (+1/-0)

I hope you weren't hurt - you know got ink on your face. I got egg on my face once.

[ - ] account deleted by user 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 02:32:59 ago (+1/-0)

account deleted by user

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 02:41:07 ago (+1/-0)

Nice.My four (4) pens cost $5.

[ - ] account deleted by user 0 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 03:09:07 ago (+0/-0)

account deleted by user

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 2 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 02:08:18 ago (+2/-0)

Sir I have the feeling you're mocking me.

[ - ] CRKT_M16Z 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 09:20:52 ago (+1/-0)

Ugh, I've had dark mode on for so long, I didn't realize Voat had a daywalker mode.

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 20:24:48 ago (+0/-0)

what does it mean? Doesn't my pic show or something?

[ - ] CRKT_M16Z 0 points 3 yearsApr 22, 2022 06:17:39 ago (+0/-0)

To the left of the "log off" button, there is a little light bulb button. Press it and you'll see what I mean.

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 1 point 3 yearsApr 22, 2022 06:29:27 ago (+1/-0)

Penny's dropped. Thanks. I now see what Ottawa Man was on about.

[ - ] Anus_Expander 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 10:32:48 ago (+1/-0)

I'm gonna tell her later during playtime

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 20:23:21 ago (+0/-0)

arsehole!

[ - ] Laputois 1 point 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 14:31:19 ago (+1/-0)

You are a faggot if you use anything other than Pilot G-2 1.0mm Bold Gel pens with Japanese ink. You faggot.

[ - ] paul_neri [op] 0 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 20:22:35 ago (+0/-0)

mate, mate...to find a pen when you need one, any pen, is to chance upon a golden egg in my house so I ain't fussy.

[ - ] loud_niglet -1 points 3 yearsApr 21, 2022 21:37:30 ago (+0/-1)

You did the write thing, neri.