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My wife wants a sister wife

submitted by dusttree to whatever 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 18:51:12 ago (+3/-4)     (whatever)

Title says it all. She’s been talking about it since we met but I always shut it down (women are expensive and jealous creatures) but the subject keeps tearing its head every so often. Last night in bed she brings it back up and made some pretty good points (low white birth rates, generational wealth, power in numbers etc. what would you guys do in my position?


56 comments block

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[ - ] beece -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:13:00 ago (+1/-2)*

You need to thank her for bringing it up. That lets her know it was good to have shared it, and tell her that you would like to talk about it some more over time and explore it further.

Seriously, this is likely a powerful thing she has in her soul, and you won't have a wife in the future unless you at least explore what it is she is thinking this drive of hers would look like if it were to become reality.

The reality is that most women don't want to be a 3rd wheel, as a man, I think that would be a great thing in many ways. The company of men (for women), for conversation only, is radically different than the conversation between women.Many Mormons make it work for a variety of reasons.

[ - ] dusttree [op] -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:20:05 ago (+0/-1)

I appreciate the actual input, it’s nice there are men here who can discuss things rationally. She had always been curious about it but she said her idea for it solidified after our successful homebirth. Her rationale is that since I fufill my role as a man so we’ll shed feel as if another woman would bring a powerful element into the relationship and provide the means to a large and successful family. Can’t say I disagree with her

[ - ] deleted -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:50:10 ago (+0/-1)

deleted

[ - ] dusttree [op] 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:56:43 ago (+3/-1)

That’s the plan. Even if it never becomes a reality we plan on having 10 children. We’ve homebirthed and homeschooled all of ours so far

[ - ] 4thTurning -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 23:03:36 ago (+0/-1)

As long as she gives you total control and authority over picking the wife. Do it.

[ - ] dosvydanya_freedomz 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 18:53:37 ago (+1/-0)

what is a sister wife? you mean like a concubine

[ - ] dusttree [op] -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 18:58:07 ago (+0/-1)

lol I asked the same question, apparently it’s not the same thing. Concubines are lower members(slaves) that bare children but arnt in a position of power but a sister wife is another woman in equal standing to the wife? The analogy she used is women are water and men are the containers that hold them so the wives have to be as one. I’m still learning about this thing too so bare with me

[ - ] TheViciousMrPim 3 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:03:32 ago (+3/-0)

women are water and men are the containers that hold them so the wives have to be as one

Fucking what?

[ - ] dusttree [op] -2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:06:11 ago (+0/-2)

I’m trying to make sense of it too man

[ - ] TheViciousMrPim 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:14:18 ago (+2/-0)

So how would you work this legally? If she isn't your legal wife they aren't equals as wife. She has pretty close to zero rights in this household. Which I think would generate friction at some point.

[ - ] dusttree [op] -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:23:09 ago (+0/-1)

That’s a point I brought up to her and she kind of rambled off about how shitty the government is so no answer on her side I’m that category

[ - ] NaturalSelectionistWorker -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:00:15 ago (+0/-1)

Is there another woman she actually gets along with that well? Who's not already with someone else?

[ - ] dusttree [op] 0 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:15:32 ago (+1/-1)

She’s got several single friends she confides in but I haven’t dived super deep into who she would want to be the sister wife. Ive still been telling her I don’t approve of the idea so she doesn’t get carried away and get us into a bad situation. Life’s been good for me the last couple years and I’d like to keep it that way. All that being said she’s a legitimately good woman and I honestly don’t think she has any malicious intent behind wanting it. frankly I’m a bit flattered she thinks I’m man enough to handle it

[ - ] ymihere 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:13:59 ago (+1/-0)

Tell her she’s the one who completes you and she’s the best wife a guy could have…then go screw the office secretary… male or female!

[ - ] dosvydanya_freedomz 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:26:00 ago (+1/-0)

🤣🤣🤣

[ - ] WNwoman 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:26:40 ago (+3/-2)

Assuming this is not a perverted LARP, you need to shut this down. Regardless of what the polygamist reality shows portray, this never ends well. Jealousy is a natural and normal response to sharing your spouse and it will destroy your family. Women can be petty AF and the children will suffer.

Did it work in olden times? Sure, but women had no rights back then. Today if you do this and it blows up she could divorce rape you and take your children in a heartbeat. Don’t fool yourself on how trad wife she is now.

[ - ] s23erdctfvyg 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:29:59 ago (+2/-1)

Did it work in olden times?
It wasn't normal for northern Europeans at any time.

[ - ] s23erdctfvyg 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:28:45 ago (+3/-2)

Do you want your descendants to be rapists, murderers, and backstabbing thieves?
No?
Then don't do it you idiot.

Before you say "TheY WonT ENd uP THaT wAy". Tell me what the most successful behaviors are when there aren't enough women for each man. Now tell me what the result of polygamy is in terms of how many woman there are for each man.

You have an entire planet to reference for why it's a bad fucking idea.

[ - ] NaturalSelectionistWorker -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:02:41 ago (+1/-2)

I had this debate with Helena once. Right now our people need more incentive to violently defend our lands. If monogamy makes men less violent and polygamy makes men more violent, maybe we should be more polygamous.

[ - ] s23erdctfvyg 3 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:33:06 ago (+3/-0)

There's a very large difference between necessary violence and unnecessary violence.
Polygomy pushes races towards the latter, not the former.

[ - ] NaturalSelectionistWorker 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:55:53 ago (+1/-0)

Have one wife work while the other stays home. All the benefits of a two income household with none of the drawbacks.

[ - ] Sleazy 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:05:08 ago (+1/-0)

Just tell her, why stop at one? Why not 3 or 4 or 5 sister wives?

[ - ] dusttree [op] -2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:08:08 ago (+0/-2)

Right!? Lol

[ - ] Peleg 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 18:59:20 ago (+2/-0)

Are you a mormon!?

[ - ] dusttree [op] 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:00:29 ago (+2/-1)

She was but left the church a few years ago. I’m just a regular guy

[ - ] dosvydanya_freedomz 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:22:39 ago (+1/-0)

She was but left the church a few years ago.

ohhhh i see where is she coming from now. she still have the mormon ideas. i dont want to sound disrespectful but does she wants to sleep with the "sister wife" too??

i think that she wants to explore a 3some but she is afraid to be direct so she is going for the sister wife angle.

having threesomes can be dangerous to the relationship because quite often one of the sexes will get attached to the third person and specially if she or he has BI tendencies.

becareful goat!

[ - ] dusttree [op] -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:16:39 ago (+0/-1)

She’s not into having sex with other woman, that’s the first thing I asked her is if she’s wanting some weird orgy thing and she isn’t sexually attracted to women

[ - ] dosvydanya_freedomz 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:26:52 ago (+2/-0)

okay good to know. but still be careful what are going to do about this. the current laws are not your ally. God forbid if you have issues with the sister or wife later on.

personally, i wouldnt do it even if as dude it would bring me pleasure to knock up two women at the same time. the potential trouble is just not worth it. the kids that you raise will resent you because they will perceive the others to be the favorites.

dude, tell her that you just want to have kids with her and that's it.

to each its own!

[ - ] dusttree [op] -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:28:41 ago (+0/-1)

I good perspective, I appreciate the input

[ - ] dosvydanya_freedomz 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:32:37 ago (+2/-0)

I appreciate the input

yeah i dont enjoy to see people suffer or in distress. dont know you but wish you and your mrs a happy and fulfilled life.

[ - ] dusttree [op] -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:38:25 ago (+0/-1)

Thank you. I hope the same for you my friend

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:57:18 ago (+2/-0)

Listen to me, women cannot live in the same house together. a war starts and guess who gets in the middle of it? Your life will become a hell. I was like Jack Tripper in my younger day and it worked for a while but when emotions grow stronger the bullshit starts. If one thinks you are doing something more with the other the resentment starts building until it explodes into nuclear war. But, if you don't plan on being with this chic for the longterm then have at it and fuck yourself silly til shit goes south

[ - ] deleted 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 22, 2023 10:26:40 ago (+1/-0)

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[ - ] dusttree [op] -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 21:07:52 ago (+1/-2)

Good advice. I certainly appreciate your viewpoint

[ - ] Lost_In_The_Thinking 3 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 22:30:03 ago (+3/-0)

Been there. Not going into any details about whether it got beyond the discussion state, but nothing good will come of it. If a spouse is asking to invite a third person into the bedroom, that means that person doesn't want to be married.

You've been warned, OP.

[ - ] dusttree [op] -2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 22:32:48 ago (+0/-2)

I hear you but she doesn’t want to have sex or threesomes with this person, that would be weird. I am interested without pushing for details in your perspective on it

[ - ] Lost_In_The_Thinking 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 22:40:53 ago (+2/-0)

Only one wife in the house. One husband, who is in charge of the household, and one wife, who is in charge of the home. Anyone else is a roommate or a boarder and has no status. Again, I have experience with this. Put your foot down at once. You're in charge, the wife is a child who can't see the big picture and has images in her mid of someone like her, with shared interests and a similar temperament, just doing "sister wife" things in bliss. This is delusional and can't and could never work.

[ - ] dusttree [op] 0 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 22:42:49 ago (+1/-1)

A good perspective, definitely will take into consideration

[ - ] Lost_In_The_Thinking 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 22:48:31 ago (+2/-0)

Thank you. I wasn't always a traditional family type, but considering how modern marriages dissolve easily, and looking as the experiences of people from the 70s who advocated the whole "open marriage" thing, it's obvious that the reason for monogamy and excluding other people from the relationship is to prevent the dissolution of the marriage. I hope you found all of this helpful.

[ - ] Anus_Expander 4 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:22:31 ago (+4/-0)

She would think it's a great idea until the new chick moved in

[ - ] dosvydanya_freedomz 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:24:55 ago (+2/-0)

She would think it's a great idea until the new chick moved in

she wants to open the pandoras box it seems

[ - ] Anus_Expander 4 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:44:12 ago (+4/-0)

Almost all kinky shit is best left in fantasyland, esp. swinger/swap shit. It rarely survives the cold light of day.

[ - ] dosvydanya_freedomz 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:51:44 ago (+2/-0)

yeppers

[ - ] Tallest_Skil 5 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:52:52 ago (+5/-0)

Women have no comprehension of just how jealous they are until they’re in that situation. She’s asking to destroy herself and she doesn’t even know it. Obviously you don’t do it.

[ - ] dusttree [op] -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:55:26 ago (+1/-2)

You’re not wrong and it’s the main point I bring up to her about the whole thing. Jealousy is a nasty destroyer are mental health and God only knows women are already nuts lol

[ - ] Tallest_Skil 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 22, 2023 10:20:48 ago (+1/-0)

She’s telling you she wants more babies (herself) and therefore more sex. You might be exhausted for a while, but giving her what she doesn’t know she wants is a much better response than (99.9% potentially) destroying the relationship based on her whims.

[ - ] Bufordxl 5 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:21:55 ago (+5/-0)

There is about a .001% chance of this ending well.

[ - ] 4thTurning -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 23:05:06 ago (+0/-1)

Yeah it only worked for men for thousands of years

[ - ] deleted 1 point 1.4 yearsDec 22, 2023 10:25:50 ago (+1/-0)

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[ - ] 4thTurning -1 points 1.4 yearsDec 23, 2023 03:36:54 ago (+0/-1)

Alexander had how many wives?

And before you respond...."but he was a king".

Yep. Aspire to be a king.

[ - ] deleted 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 23, 2023 08:06:51 ago (+2/-0)

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[ - ] Portmanure 6 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 18:59:40 ago (+6/-0)

This is a clever ploy to get you into an open marriage. They’re learning if they come right out and ask for an open marriage you’ll know she’s cheating or planning to cheat. Marriage over! So, this sister wife offer is just a carrot on a stick, once you take the bait and agree to it, she’ll change the rules slightly because, you know, fairness and equality. Then WHAM! You’re in an open marriage. Don’t do it, if you’re a traditional monogamist just the mere offer means it’s over.

[ - ] deleted 3 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:27:56 ago (+3/-0)

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[ - ] dosvydanya_freedomz 2 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 20:27:49 ago (+2/-0)

This is a clever ploy to get you into an open marriage

yup i'm seen the same thing, she wants to eat some pussy too

[ - ] dusttree [op] 0 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:02:30 ago (+1/-1)

I thought the exact same thing but she doesn’t want to be with other men (so far as she’s said at least, you know how women are) and said that she just thinks having another woman as a part of the family to help with the woman roles and have babies with her is her dream. We adhere to traditional gender roles

[ - ] dusttree [op] 0 points 1.4 yearsDec 21, 2023 19:02:50 ago (+1/-1)

I thought the exact same thing but she doesn’t want to be with other men (so far as she’s said at least, you know how women are) and said that she just thinks having another woman as a part of the family to help with the woman roles and have babies with her is her dream. We adhere to traditional gender roles