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How To Poop In A Bathroom When Someone Is Outside The Door ?

submitted by ItalianMan to AskUpgoat 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 04:55:42 ago (+4/-2)     (AskUpgoat)



19 comments block

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[ - ] Shitheel 0 points 3.4 yearsDec 1, 2021 17:55:12 ago (+0/-0)

This takes me back to my days in boot camp, especially the time spent in the rifle range barracks. The ones with no stalls for the toilets. The first time I had to shit there, I looked at the open toilets, looked at my insecurity, and just said fuck it, time to man up. Never had a problem since.

[ - ] texasblood 1 point 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 17:18:38 ago (+1/-0)

Simply proclaim "nice dick".
Works every time.

[ - ] bobdole9 0 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 14:28:40 ago (+0/-0)

Need to add some dialog. Something like
OH GOD IT BURNS
should be effective to discourage lingering in a public shitter.

[ - ] BlowjaySimpson 1 point 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 12:00:45 ago (+1/-0)

Scream the pledge of allegiance during.

[ - ] Nigloo_Dismantler 0 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 11:45:54 ago (+0/-0)

Faggot...

[ - ] NaturalSelectionistWorker 2 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 08:12:59 ago (+2/-0)

Step 1: Stop giving a single fuck what other people think.

That should take care of everything.

[ - ] YamaMaya 0 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 08:02:44 ago (+0/-0)

Loud and proud, transferring embarrassment onto them so they leave.

[ - ] nada 2 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 06:26:17 ago (+2/-0)

Silently let the toots out. Flush before a big push to mask the sound.

[ - ] Centaurus 1 point 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 07:43:17 ago (+1/-0)

Turn the shower and the sink water on. Turn radio up to 11. Take shit.

[ - ] account deleted by user 14 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 05:52:49 ago (+14/-0)

account deleted by user

[ - ] v0atmage 9 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 07:46:48 ago (+9/-0)

Pajeet edition: Step 0: find a square foot of untainted street space.

[ - ] dingbat 2 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 07:48:53 ago (+2/-0)

Lol!!!

[ - ] AlexanderMorose13 2 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 09:43:21 ago (+2/-0)

Step 0.1: Fail at this basic assessment, give up, and then find a bush in a public space where there's plenty of wind and go to town.

[ - ] TheViciousMrPim 11 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 05:47:47 ago (+11/-0)

Open the door, establish eye contact dominance and shit like an alpha.

[ - ] 1Icemonkey 5 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 05:03:08 ago (+5/-0)

Well, you blocked me, and muhfeelings are still hurt, but I’ll tell you anyway what I do in this instance.
I’m assuming your asshole is completely blown out and you have no control over your bowels. In otherwords, to can’t get or keep your shit together.

Regardless, flush while you’re dumping. It’s called a “courtesy flush”. This way no one will hear your faggoty bowel discharge, the semen flying out of your ass at warp speed, etc.

Of course unless you want someone to hear your anal gape, in an effort to attract even more suitors, by all means, ignore the above.

[ - ] WanderingToast 3 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 06:21:46 ago (+3/-0)

Lol

[ - ] dingbat 1 point 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 07:50:03 ago (+1/-0)

I’m seconding the lol. “Anal gape.” 😂

[ - ] mikenigger 0 points 3.4 yearsNov 26, 2021 07:44:49 ago (+0/-0)

I’m assuming your asshole is completely blown out and you have no control over your bowels

lol stop projecting