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Republican Jesus

submitted by Sal_180 to funny 1 weekApr 21, 2025 11:09:40 ago (+5/-4)     (files.catbox.moe)

https://files.catbox.moe/u6j3oo.jpeg



7 comments block


[ - ] BoozyB 1 point 1 weekApr 21, 2025 14:01:46 ago (+1/-0)

I think I read somewhere that He chased the (((moneychangers))) out of the temple.

[ - ] CHIRO 1 point 1 weekApr 21, 2025 11:16:45 ago (+1/-0)*

Well, Jesus had medical magic.

Jesus was a stranger.

Jesus had food magic.

And Jesus was fine with being poor because Jesus had medical and food magic. He also couch hopped for the entire course of his public ministry.

So, God preaching liberal progressive values is a bit like the ultra rich preaching those values. God, like the rich, is by no means practical. That's one thing if the apocalypse happens. It's another thing if two-thousand years of very non-magical time ensues.

[ - ] Puller_of_Noses 1 point 1 weekApr 21, 2025 13:12:31 ago (+1/-0)

Then Jesus said unto the sick, 'You're cured'.
Then Jesus said unto the stranger, 'How did you get past the gates of heaven?'
Then Jesus said unto the hungry, 'You mean you still don't know how to fish or cook?'
Then Jesus said unto the poor, 'Maybe if we racially discriminate against White people, it will make the brown people equal.'

They were right.
The left can't meme.

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 0 points 1 weekApr 21, 2025 16:48:53 ago (+0/-0)

If chinks would've invaded Galilee Jesus would've beat them with a whip

[ - ] NoRefunds 0 points 1 weekApr 21, 2025 14:07:28 ago (+0/-0)

Jesus didn't say give away your country so niggers and kikes can kill you all

[ - ] NaturalSelectionistWorker 0 points 1 weekApr 21, 2025 12:19:54 ago (+0/-0)

This Jesus would be somewhat better than the kike that the kikes gave us to worship, but he'd still be a subversive kike like Ben Shapiro or Prager.

[ - ] goatfugee12 -1 points 1 weekApr 21, 2025 12:21:08 ago (+0/-1)

the christcucks don't like to admit that jewsus would have been a commmunist just like the rest of his ilk.