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I was at a friend's garage band party and while I'm sitting waiting for the next band to set up this girl sits down next to me.
I swear to God, this is her opener:
"I hate when people say Chinese people are a minority, there's like a billion of them."
I look at her and say, "I feel the same way about blacks, Arabs, and Indians."
She replies, "Speaking of blacks, I'm tired of commercials trying to convince me to fuck them. That's gross."
Fuckin' a right sister.

Now here's a twist, she had blue hair.