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36

Just Completed a Mission

submitted by Kozel to TellUpgoat 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 01:09:41 ago (+37/-1)     (TellUpgoat)

Nothing special, but whatever.

Quick backstory, I bought a house and a month after I moved in homeless faggots appeared down the street. They shit everything up and throw trash and block the sidewalk.

Anyway, yesterday I was walking from the grocery store and saw these homeless faggots breaking a county water pipe. Probably to wash their ass after shitting on the street. It was three of them and I was unarmed but I cussed them out and sad I'm calling the cops. Two ran away, but they came back just in time for the cops to respond.

I scouted the area today in the daytime, and I noted that the multiple waterpipes protruding from the ground had a hose either attached to them or lying near them. I disposed of the hoses laying around but didn't want to approach the one attached during the daytime, as I don't want to get caught up destroying county property and there were two faggots laying around it.

So tonight, I tried to sleep, but it wasn't happening. So I put on my robe and wizard hat (nondescript clothing and camo mask) and went on a patrol. Immediately I saw some homeless faggot with his homeless shit on the corner. I snuck up on him and blasted him with a flashlight, he got spooked seeing some half camo dude hooded up with just his eyes showing.

"Are you camping here?"
"No, I'm just -"
"Time to leave"

Keep walking, he takes off. He was one of the faggots from the previous day.

I approach the attached hose in question, take my knife out, and hear a click click click of a bicycle behind me.

Turn around some crackhead is approaching me and looking. But then he sees I'm masked up hooded up holding an extended knife in my hand flips his head forward and steps on it.

Coming back I spot the camping faggot in the distance looking into a trashcan. Put my flashlight on turbo mode and blast him again as I'm jogging in his direction, he hops on his bike and takes off.

Just a bit over one week to my CCW "interview". Yeah, California. I'll amp up the pressure on these faggots soon.

Until then, I think for my next move I'm going to coat everything these faggots touch in sticky insect goop. I'm going to make things as difficult for these faggots as I can. If these mickey-mouse steps don't work I might start waterbaloon ammonia drone drops.


47 comments block


[ - ] puremadness 12 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 01:36:55 ago (+12/-0)

A credit to your community.

[ - ] Kozel [op] 9 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 02:20:17 ago (+9/-0)

Right now me and my black neighbor, an old ex air force dude that's lived here before I was born, are waging the battle. He's friends with the Sheriffs. I don't want to call him a nigger he's very cordial and has given me some helpful advice pertaining to my property.

The Mexicans and Asians and White boomers don't do shit. There's a Russian couple down the street, they walked past me while I was working in the garage and said Hi, but I heard them speaking Russian and said Privet (informal hello), and now they say zdrastvuyte (formal hello) the few times I've seen them. I need to catch them by the mailbox and invite them to eat steak and beer see what they're about.

[ - ] UncleDoug 6 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 02:33:12 ago (+6/-0)

Blyattmann The Hero Gotham needs

Your secret Identity is safe with us Kozel.

[ - ] Kozel [op] 7 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 03:02:42 ago (+7/-0)

Update: I carried out the second stage of my operation, which was to coat the most popular pipe with "Tangle Trap Sticky Coating". The other pipe has a grate over it, I was going to coat that as well, but while I was coating the fist pipe some car did a circle in the adjacent parking lot and pulled up right next to me. I yelled at them in a threatening manner but they didn't budge, figured they're calling the cops, so I dumped a bunch of the coating and slid off into the shadows. God damn this fucking shit is sticky. I fucked up wearing only one glove. Rubbing alcohol gets it off but soap doesn't work. They're gonna be pissed tomorrow when they touch it.

[ - ] HeyJames 8 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 03:06:36 ago (+8/-0)

This is what we all need to be doing.

[ - ] Trumpman1488 -5 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 07:02:24 ago (+0/-5)

This is a fedpost. Let the Cops take care of it.

[ - ] Drstrangestgov 5 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 07:52:28 ago (+5/-0)

Americans don't call the cops. Americans handle their own shit

[ - ] HeyJames -1 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 13:28:20 ago (+0/-1)

No. Americans watch football and don't do shit.

[ - ] Drstrangestgov 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 23:20:54 ago (+1/-1)

Those aren't Americans. Those are swifties.

[ - ] HeyJames 0 points 6 monthsOct 23, 2024 10:29:11 ago (+0/-0)

99.9% of Americans are swifties apparently

[ - ] Drstrangestgov 1 point 6 monthsOct 23, 2024 14:14:57 ago (+1/-0)

Horsepuckey

[ - ] Kozel [op] 1 point 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 14:00:08 ago (+1/-0)

Hey cops, some faggot is rolling a shopping cart down the street at 2am looking in trash cans.

Are the trash cans on public property? There's nothing we can do.

Even though he is stealing from the county waste at this point.

[ - ] paul_neri -4 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 03:52:40 ago (+0/-4)

Ok. I am very sympathetic to you and your neighbours but...where do homeless people go?

[ - ] Kozel [op] 6 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 04:07:46 ago (+7/-1)

Somewhere where I'm not. This is my hood. They need to check in with me.

[ - ] MuricaPersonified 2 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 05:16:20 ago (+2/-0)

To a fucking employment office. Barring that, a six foot hole in the ground also works.

[ - ] paul_neri -2 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 05:17:38 ago (+0/-2)

Where they could be employed...f..king!

[ - ] MuricaPersonified 4 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 05:38:54 ago (+4/-0)

If they laid down the meth pipe for just four days they would be clean and could work literally anywhere. It's California, there's plenty of fast food and warehouses, and that state will practically give those dregs houses just because they're poor.

[ - ] yesiknow 2 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 06:08:20 ago (+2/-0)

They belong in forced treatment and residential care. Period. If they're from another country that's where they go.

[ - ] paul_neri -4 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 04:06:15 ago (+0/-4)

In Aus homeless people have been murdered in their cars by territorial thugs.The State should address the problem not individuals.

[ - ] Kozel [op] 7 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 04:21:46 ago (+7/-0)

good.

[ - ] bobdole9 3 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 07:14:44 ago (+3/-0)

It's almost like people think these homeless fucks are "good people" that just lost their job.

A plurality are oxygen thieves...stopping the theft benefits society.

[ - ] paul_neri 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 18:32:03 ago (+0/-0)

Don't get me wrong, dude, I'd be as pissed off as Kozel if I was surrounded by the types in question.There are just proper ways of addressing a social issue and Kozel ain't one of them.

[ - ] bobdole9 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 18:47:22 ago (+0/-0)

California has been failing at solving this issue. The issue is the individuals and Ronald Reagan for closing the looney bins.

I'd rather have immigrants fresh from crossing the border over homeless...there's less chance of issues.

I've witnessed a lot of karma lately...we will hear if Kozel gets his.

[ - ] VitaminSieg 3 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 10:12:05 ago (+3/-0)

The State causes 'homelessness'

[ - ] paul_neri -4 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 05:19:17 ago (+1/-5)

It's surprising how quickly an otherwise respectable member of society can become homeless - business goes bust followed by marriage...

[ - ] Kozel [op] 4 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 05:29:20 ago (+4/-0)

Hey retard,

These are not respectable members of society.

These are low IQ subhumans who spend their day sitting around on a sidewalk throwing trash on the street with broken bycicles scattered around and stolen shopping carts full of trash.

[ - ] bobdole9 4 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 07:11:45 ago (+4/-0)

Those who've never been to California have no idea what caliber of homeless shit-tier humans exist.

[ - ] Clubberlang 2 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 11:05:17 ago (+2/-0)*

West coast in general.

Lived in Tacoma about 20 years ago.

Every day a dude in woman's clothing would cross the street and this was before the fronthole madness we're made to believe is safe and effective for the common good.

They has a gas station on the corner dubbed "stop and rob". You'd be filling up your car on the pump side and they'd rob you on the other side. Or just straight up carjacking or stick and moves.

Tacoma was enriched before the enrichment began.

A millenials type of town.

Sucks about Buzzards records though.

[ - ] Clubberlang 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 11:04:44 ago (+0/-0)

Queeri fucks guys that resemble your description.

[ - ] paul_neri 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 18:28:21 ago (+0/-0)

Reported.

[ - ] paul_neri -4 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 05:36:11 ago (+0/-4)

Ok but "moving them on" out of your neighbourhood makes them someone else's problem. Understandably you don't have a problem with that but Society does. The homeless people issue is everyone's problem. It is for Government to find answers, not vigilantes.

[ - ] Kozel [op] 4 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 05:39:12 ago (+4/-0)

Yeah. Softest target. That's how the world spins. Step up or sit down. If the other neighborhood wants to sit, I have no problem with it. If it was up to me, I'd solve the matter permanently, and society wouldn't mind, but the state doesn't want that.

[ - ] bobdole9 2 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 07:12:58 ago (+2/-0)

makes them someone else's problem

They should have never been a burden to anyone to begin with.

[ - ] Clubberlang 2 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 11:13:27 ago (+2/-0)

It is for Government to find answers, not vigilantes.

Like 0biden claiming he'll cure cancer if elected. (He has 14 days left).

There's no benefit to the government finding a solution to homelessness.

Although there is a benefit in creating a environmental where everyone would be potentially homeless if they don't comply.

[ - ] paul_neri 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 18:26:35 ago (+0/-0)

Dude, I don't mean to be rude, but you're paranoid.

[ - ] Clubberlang 0 points 6 monthsOct 27, 2024 12:56:18 ago (+0/-0)

And you're as your liberal yiddish cocksuckin friends say, "weird." I mean I don't mean to be rude.

[ - ] paul_neri 0 points 6 monthsOct 28, 2024 03:10:19 ago (+0/-0)

Rude!

[ - ] yesiknow 2 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 06:05:59 ago (+2/-0)

You gain a voracious appetite for your own imaginary compassion and make everyone else's lives dangerous and miserable. It's childish and irresponsible. The bullshit of compassion narcissism requires a war against the bullshitters.

[ - ] paul_neri 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 18:29:39 ago (+0/-0)

You're just having a bad hair day.

[ - ] Drstrangestgov 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 07:50:59 ago (+0/-0)

Its a start! Baby steps to expelling cartoons

[ - ] NoRefunds 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 08:01:08 ago (+0/-0)

Stop wasting time and just mace them

[ - ] PeckerwoodPerry 5 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 08:52:04 ago (+5/-0)

Like a medieval mace, right?

[ - ] oppressed -2 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 09:09:12 ago (+1/-3)

you need to chill out. you seem like a danger to your community. plus you should still have compassion on the homeless

[ - ] JudyStroyer 3 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 09:35:47 ago (+3/-0)

Good work, bro. Make sure you leave your phone at home. You are an inspiration as there have some thefts here as of late. Been thinking about similar things. Have a pretty good idea who. Will definitely post here if anything comes. Thanks again for taking care of your area bro. Respect. \o

[ - ] SocksOnCats 1 point 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 12:28:22 ago (+1/-0)

Love the ammonia drone drops. Been wanting to build a bomber drone for a while now but nobody I find seems to know how. Got any leads on that?

[ - ] HonkyMcNiggerSpic 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 15:27:32 ago (+0/-0)

Throwing dead rotting animals at their little hangout area works and is funny. But if no dead animals then You'd be amazed how stanky fish get.

[ - ] SirNiggsalot 0 points 6 monthsOct 21, 2024 16:02:33 ago (+0/-0)

Thanks for the update.
Let us know when all.the bums have been removed
Godspeed !