Also don't forget to check out extreme peace tonight
To try to re explain the title, I suddenly remember the way I was at 18. But I did not remember it until I hit the point of being pleased with war. At that moment and ever since that moment there has been a mirror. My reaction to my new tolerances, the things I'm able to imagine and Digest, my real reaction is that oh my God I must have been possessed by a demon. The actual demons in my life have been women and marijuana. If too many women and marijuanas can take 1998 me and make him tolerate all this shit, then damn.
I never thought it would happen to me. I never wanted to ever touch the stuff but when a close friend I trusted with my life introduced me to crack cocaine he said it wasn't as bad as i thought. The fuck it isn't. Ive been hiding this addiction for 3 years now and I just know my life is so close to crashing down into nothing because I cant stop using this nigger drug. Ive always said it was for niggers and I admit im basically a nigger now. Any advice on how I stop smoking this shit between all the deserved insults would be appreciated. I need to get a grip and I can't believe ive managed to hold my life together this long.. but I can feel the rocky bottom fast approaching and im desperate to stop. This is absolutely a cry for help.
